Girl Game 500: How to Get Married

If that's really what you want, find your dark horse, or consider dating older men

May 28, 2025

Note: Please read The Meaning of Marriage post I made first to make sure you know what you’re in for!

If you’re a man reading this, start here. To be attractive to women, you need to build an attractive life—that means being in shape, dressing well, possessing social skills and confidence, and having a successful career where you either already make good money, or have a path to making good money.

However, getting married is mostly up to women, because women are the ones who choose whether a relationship starts in the first place. It is a man’s imperative to show interest, and it is a woman’s imperative to make a good choice in who she accepts or denies. For example, I talked to a lot of women just yesterday and they all either had boyfriends or told me no—and that is their prerogative! And then just this morning I met a stunner walking to work who gave me big eyes, and after we talked for a bit, her number. We’re getting sushi after she gets off work tonight!

Anyway, women who are often single and have trouble meeting high quality men need to examine to what extent they are bad at making choices in this regard. The most common example of this is not giving the guy a chance to shoot his shot, or saying no too often when he does without investigating if he’s a baller. Here’s an easy hack: tell him, “Alright big shot, but I’ve gotta make sure you’re not a maniac—let me see your IG or LinkedIn.” Some guys may not have an IG, but I guarantee if he has any sort of decent career, he’s got a LinkedIn. Easy to see from there what kind of dude he is.

Also ladies, if you’re only trying to meet the top 10% best looking guys in your market on dating apps, who are no more than 5 years older than you and are successful, tall, confident, and have game, this is going to be VERY difficult. Because literally every single woman your age on the apps is targeting those exact same guys. Are you top 10% beautiful? If not, that guy is unlikely to offer his commitment—and he may never offer it to anyone until he gets quite a bit older and wants to settle down. If you give a man the option to have casual sex with as many attractive women as he wants anytime he opens his phone, he will often choose to do just that.

Here are the basic steps if you want to get married, description to follow (great podcast on this by Orion Taraban—I want to make sure to give credit where due):

Increase the size of your dating pool by targeting older men and/or your dark horse.
Once you find a dude you like, make his life demonstrably better (he should do the same for you).
After six months to a year, move in together.
If you want children, or could want children, this will help.
After one to three years, he will propose and you will both take your marriage seriously as I’ve suggested above.

First, ladies, you have give yourself more options, and the right kind of options. You can do this in one of two ways: specifically target men 7-20 years older, or find your dark horse—a guy who isn’t there quite yet, but who’s on his way. He’s got what it takes to be successful and will be. Remember, it can take men a bit of time before we start kicking ass. Find a guy like that and support him until he makes it, and he will be forever loyal.

As for men who are somewhat older, there’s a natural convergence of mutually beneficial things that happen when older men date younger women. She gets a guy who’s established, makes good money, is mature, and can offer her his experience and leadership. He gets a woman who’s still in the flower of her youth, and who may still want/be able to have kids. A lot of women have been conned into believing this is gross, or wrong, but that is purely because they’ve bought into the propaganda they see on social media and elsewhere. No where else in the world do they stigmatize older man, younger woman relationships like in the Western US, Canada, and Great Britain.

I’ve got a secret for you, so listen close: if you get your advice for life on TikTok and Reddit, YOU ARE FUCKED. Life wisdom isn’t dished out in 60 second clips by losers who spend all day on their phones. FAFO.

Smart women know this. Remember: there’s a HUGE advantage in life for anyone who is willing to break with social convention to achieve their goals. I’m not suggesting women date guys twice their age, but setting your app filters for 7-20 years older is going to give you the opportunity to meet a successful, eligible bachelors who are far more willing to commit to a long term relationship and get married. You should also stop caring if he’s been married before or has kids—that’s actually a good sign. It means he’s a family man. He’s done it before, and if statistics are any indication, it probably wasn’t his idea to get a divorce. And many women, especially younger women, will not follow this advice, so your competition will be far less than fighting it out for the fuckbois.

Once you’ve found your guy, make his life better—he should do the same for you, otherwise he’s not the guy. Being nice, helping him become a better man, frequent sex, and consistent, clear communication is the key to winning his heart. And if his life is better with you in it, he’s not going to stray, because all his needs are being met.

Eventually this should lead to living together—timeline is up to you, but typically sometime after six months to a year, if you both love each other, then it’s time to shack up officially. This should happen before marriage. You need to live together to find out if it’s going to be a good idea—to deal with the fact his shoes smell, and he’s a messy cook, and that he will sometimes do things that are unintentionally inconsiderate or annoying. Remember, you’re not perfect either, and he’ll have to deal with your shit too.

Finally, if you want to get married, it helps if you want to have children. Like, that is a really good reason for a man to go ring shopping and commit to you for the rest of his life. For some men it’s the only reason he will do so. My personal opinion is that marriage is actually pointless if there aren’t children involved, but people should do whatever they want—I just see no reason to have a contract with the state to stay with someone I can choose to stay with anyway. Marriage protects children in the case of divorce, and is therefore necessary in that case.

Anyway, whatever is best for you as a couple, after sometime between a year or three, he should be ready to propose. Don’t be pushy, but do bring it up from time to time, and let him know how SERIOUSLY you are going to take being married to him, and that you will do everything in your power to be a good and supportive partner. He should promise you the same.

If you don’t want to do the things I’ve just suggested, you DON’T actually want to get married, and therefore you probably shouldn’t. Like, if you can’t commit to making your man’s life better, for example, why in the world would any man want to marry you?

A: he would not.

That’s all I got for now Turtle Doves. Love and peace to you. Namaste.

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